"At the touch of love, everyone becomes a poet."

Thursday, September 30, 2010

Post 59.. Post Finite..

Might this be the end? NO~~~~~~~~~~~~~!! This will be the Post in 59... Maria Maria~~~ I like Maria Maria.. Nice song.. classical...Todae.. i talked to my brother about love... And he said love is when you let go to make that person happy.. I said love is not about why you love that person.. It is about How.. Let say if you're walking on the streets with a friend and you see a pretty girl walking down the streets. Your friend will say: "WAAA~~!! CHIO BU LEH!" you might also agree.. But if you walk down the streets and saw the girl you fancy.. and your friend asks you whether she is pretty or not.. You'll probably not be able to say anything.. Cos her beauty is beyond words and too great to be described by words alone...

Heard something funny from my friend.. apparently.. some girl likes me and i dunno who.. Its probably some kinda rumors... but if it is true.. I cant believe someone would go for me.. 

Beyond Words.

A wise man said,
Love is when you let go.

But how can you let go of her...
When her beauty is beyond words..
When her beauty is too great for our perception..
When her beauty is God's Gift to you..

Her Beauty would go beyond words if you choose to let go.. 
Love is the most beautiful when you let go with all your heart.. 
Project Smile

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

All these poems.. they have no more meanings..

YES.. No more meanings.. But i have been writing them for like.. 55 days! i'll continue writing a 100 more.. or a thousand more.. provided i get to use them somedae when i met my Miss Right.. ={D Yes.. I havent met my Miss Right yet.. This whole thing.. I dun even noe how it started.. I only know it started on the day when i went out with Fiz and WK.. Played Handball 55 daes ago.. On that day.. I tot of a poem.. And wrote it down here.. Well.. Its a habit i cant kick.. ={D


Love is when i see you and i hide..
Love is when i hear you and i get a fright..
Love is when i feel for you.. yet i cant fight..
Love is when you are not there.. and there is no light.

Love is so mysterious.. 
that i don't even know what it is anymore.. 
Love is so magical...
That it made me knew who i am always..

Love is a thing to be shared.. not a thing to be given..

Project Smile..

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

My birthdae,,

So sad.. No birthdae for me.. Nobody cares.. I dun even care.. Soon i'll forget my birthdae and sooner.. I'll forget myself.. Cos my mind is on something else..

I like Smints... I like soccer.. I managed to get two goals against a most prestigious player! two drill shots! and managed to block one out of two.. Good game.. these few days is always raining.. cannot play soccer with my brother..T_T

The Cold Rain.
The Bright Warm Sun.
The Gloomy Cold Rain.

Both gives me feeling...
One of happiness..
The other of despair.

Though you may not know it..
You're my weather man..

When you aren't there.. 
The Rain comes.
But when you are there..
The Sun comes.

You have no idea how much you mean to me.. 
You bring warmth to me even in the Cold Rain.

Project Smile..what's it again?
I finally thought it thru.. Since i made this blog.. Whats the purpose of not showing it? I have nothing to hide.. These poems keep me going in the night....

Monday, September 27, 2010

Let my woes be my own.. Let your beauty be your own..

A famous chinese song.. About a guy who likes a girl.. They were couples.. until they were seperated.. My case is different.. Its more like.. Let my woes be my own.. and let your woes be your own too.. I cant share her woes.. Im too distant and too far away.. But im on a boat.. I can row closer and closer.. MY life is like an epic novel.. Ups and downs and so many turns...


Let my woes be mine own..
and let your beauty be yours.
This can never be true..
But gladly.. 
This is not so true..

My life was shaped by you..
My character was molded by you..
You showed me what it means.
To be cheerful..
To be happy..
To be expressive..

You showed me.. A way to write my story..
A way to write an epic.. 

Will you let me write your story with yours? 
Project Smile..Thnx man.. You helped me make the smile.. ={D

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Juggling two blogs.. One art.. One poem.. ={D

Well Pringles.. Smile.. ={D Now.. on FB.. Im always smiling.. Why? Cos.. i gave up.. But of cos.. This blog will continue on.. This is not the end.. This is just new beginning.

Many people ask me.. Why? Well.. The mistake is..They nver ask how.. How did i fall for such a person.. Well the answer is this.. I never fell for her.. something just clicked in me that this person is the world's most perfect person ever..

A new beginning.

Can you give me a chance?
Not to give up?
Can you give me a chance?
Not to falter?
Can you give me a chance?
to stop loving you?


You made me give up..
You made me feel hurt..
You made me into this monster.
This is just a new beginning.. 
I would not be a Human.
Without first being a Monster.

Project Smile

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Training to be soldier..

Fight for our land~~~..Gosh.. I miss the old days in a platoon marching up and down the parade square..={D

Well.. tot im gonna play soccer.. But in the end.. RAIN COMES! T_T

Im still thinking whether i should continue with it..

She was a decoy.. Until she became real..

Im sorry.

I didnt mean to hurt you.
Cos i did not like you.
I didnt mean to hurt you.
Cos i've been using you.

But now.. 
Im hurt, cos i did.
I loved you when i shouldnt be.
I didnt think it would be..
Im sorry.. 
I used you, 
But in the end.
I fell for you. 

Project Smile.

Friday, September 24, 2010

Cash Converters: 1 Me: 0

Tot the punching bag will wait for me.. In the end it just disappeared.. Ultimate sad.. T_T

Gonna play soccer sometime at the stadium field. =D

Death is eternal peace.. Immortality is eternal suffering.

I rather die.

Somehow my blog is dying down.. Its so tiring.. But i'll persevere... Take a look at my girlfriend.

Take a look at my girlfriend.

She's got a smile,
that would make the Darkest night the Brightest Day.
She's got eyes,
That would make the world turn around on its head.

She's got the sweetest laugh i ever heard.
The most beautiful face i ever seen.
The silkiest hair i could ever feel..

The friendliest voice in this world.

But yet,
If i hear her, i feel worried for her.

Take a look at my girlfriend. 
In the future beside me.

Projekt Smile.

Thursday, September 23, 2010


My world is officially FUBAR.. F***ed up beyond any recognition... Now what? I have to deal with Elders calling me unfilial? Calling me Guai lan.. First time im saying this.. But if they think i guai lan.. unfilial.. Then I will be.

Todae i got terribly affected by something.. Beginning to feel that what lead character of Things Fall Apart is feeling.. My world is falling apart.

Time travel.

Time travel, what a marvel.
Time travel, Incredible.

But can it take me back to the past?
Before i know you?
Can it take me back to the past? 
When we are just friends?
Can it take me back to the past?
When i didn't see you?

It can only take me to the future.
Where we may be together.
It can only take me to the future.
Where i am no longer who i am.
It can only take me to the future.
There, we shall meet again.

Hopefully then,
We have changed. 


Im adding this to every post now.
Project Smile.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Waah,, Sad sia.. Waah.. Jialat sia,,

I feel like im FUBAR-ed.. Well.. I cant say for sure i am giving up now.. I just dunno what i should do.. I dunno where the hell i am heading.. I feel blinded by what's happening around me.. Talk much to her todae.. Didnt let my feelings show.. Treated her like a normal friend.. How the hell am i going to lie to the whole world for half a year? Can it be done? Is there enough time for me.. ?

Roses are red.

Roses are red,
Violets are blue.
Can i stay true?
If i belong to you?
Would you believe me?
When i say i HATE YOU!
Would you believe me?

You wouldn't,
Because my feelings will show.
Bright Crimson Red.
Gloomy Marine Blue.

I am Blue while you are Red.
Would you wait for me to become Red? 


Monday, September 20, 2010

a Long Long Day today..

Todae's a long day.. Talked to her alot.. Found out something hidden in her that i never saw before.. I guess if you stopped liking someone.. You'll notice something you'll never see before.. Caught sight of her looking my way.. Just plain coincidence.. When our eyes met.. I looked away..

Look away.

For once..
For only once.
I saw you looking my way..

If only for once.
I'll be able to talk to you, face to face.

Its impossible, 
For i wish you to smile.
Its impossible,
For i never wish you will cry.

Can it be possible.. 
That i stop looking away and face it? 

Just Look away.. Its ok. 

Sunday, September 19, 2010

No idea what i should do next..

No idea.. So many questions in my mind.. No idea why's her name's like that.. Unique.. Rings a tone in my ears.. Project "Make Her Smile" starts today..

Poems.. Can anyone give this to her?

Can you accept me? 

For so many days,
I thought of what i've done.
For so many days,
I wished that it was not what i've done.
For so many days,
I wanted it all to be mended and amended.

For so many weeks,
You ignored me.
For so many weeks,
You killed me.

But after so many months,
Can you accept me?

I don't care about the past or the present.
I care only for the future. 

Saturday, September 18, 2010

No story.. no more..

Thats it.. No story.. Cannot get any out of my head.. Soon this blog is gonna close down.. Since there is no more promise, no more hope, no more chance for me. This blog is gonna go private soon enough.. That is if i know how to make it private..



2 Days Ago,
I couldn't believe it.
A Day Ago,
I couldn't accept it.
I could only think about it.

Today's too late,
Today i'll leave behind everything i worked for.
Today is the day I stopped everything i worked for.
Today is the day I stopped.

I had a Heartbreak,
And it feels so good.
Felt relieved,
Felt like crying,
Felt like dying.
Felt like a dream.


Probably this is the last one before it goes PTD.. Nobody cares about this anyway. Probably have a new blog.. One devoid of anything like this..

Friday, September 17, 2010

Human is never fully good..

Humans are round characters.. They have the good and the bad.. Today's a friday!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOT!!.. Dunno where to go tmr.

A poem a day wakes me up at night everyday..
The First.

To most i am a mailbox,
Not one who would be noticed.
To some im just a fox,
Never to be trusted or depended.

But on that day,
You made me see.
That im not a fiend, demon or devil.
If i am the Beast,
Then you are my beauty.


Thursday, September 16, 2010


Feel so strange todae.. Felt like i got betrayed though nothing happened to me.. Must be a feelin.. Sia.. today no homework.. Damn rare..

Mock Asean Conference, At first i very enthu.. But then now.. Whenever i go for it.. I always tio pangseh by it.. Until now i dun feel like going.. W8 so long not a soul came along..

Okwonkwo.. the Strong Weak Man? The Mask? I seriously think he has low self-esteem issues..

Wah... Wonder what would happen if i did not come to school for one whole month.. Would people forget me?

Is there a name for addiction to writing poems?

So So long.

For so long i waited,
yet not a soul came along.
For so long i waited,
Yet not a thing had happened.
For so long i waited, 
I wasted so long a time.

Cause' for so long i didnt notice you.
Your long hair,
Your smile,
Your kindness.

For SO SO LONG i waited,
And i shall continue waiting.

Beauty in the eyes of the Beholder.


Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Is it a sin to like somebody?

Is it? I wish i didn't tell my friends.. I wish i just kept my mouth shut.. I wish that im just dreaming.. Now.. This stage.. Nothing will change.. I can only try one way.. 3 times.. 3 friggin times.. The same thing.. HIDE.

Nothin much to write today.. Feel so tired.. Tmr I die liao.. My homework.. Didnt manage to finish it.

Is it a Sin?

It's a Sin,
To kill your own brother.
It's a Sin,
To lust for money.
It's a Sin,
To not control yourself.
But is it a sin?
To like somebody?
If it isn't, then i made it a Sin.
If it is.. there is no repentence..

For i'll never stop falling for you, 
Every second,
Every day,
Every year,
Every lifetime.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

why's the name courtesy of fuzzy?

well.. I wrote courtesy of fuzzy.. Because fuzzy gave me the name of Jas. Only he will call me by Jas. So yeah.. nothing special..

Reading Things Fall Apart brings me a revelation.. The main character okwonkwo is the perfect ideal MAN. He is fierce, straight, powerful, strong, rough tough. But this is only what is in the outside.. HE fears becoming a weak man like his father.. Thus he is a man with an ironhide, yet with heart as soft as jelly when it comes to failure.

POEM! POEM! POEM! NOT A FRIGGIN LITTLE POEM!! OK.. IT is a friggin little poem.


What does being a man mean?
I asked myself.
What does being a man mean?
I asked my dad.
What does being a man mean?
I asked my brother.

I said,
Dad said,
Brother said,

All these are wrong.
A Real Man,
Is one who stands tall against impossible odds.
A Real Man,
Is one who is never weak inside.
A Real Man,
Is one who never hides behind the facade of Anger.

A Real Man,
Is one who never stops trying.

I am a Real Man
A Real Man,

Monday, September 13, 2010

I remember how people walk, but i cannot remember their faces..

Im strange.. I forgot the faces of my friends during the holidays.. Only the way they walk and their body language and their character.. Somehow.. I think i have photographic memory.. I can remember people clearly and very detailed from the images in my brain.. Like one is with a earphone in one ear and walking and looking away.. One is with a bag.. One is commanding.. I seem to be able to recognise people by the way they talk.. Whether they exaggerate or whether they are monotone.. Coupled with this weird ability is the ability to imitate them exactly.. =)

But there are only two persons i have no memory of.. no images of.. Only their character.. But these two are my friends and i shall not name them..

Poem.. It has become a habit for me ordy.. One that is too hard to kick.

Kick the habit.

I never did have this habit,
Of looking your way.
I never did have this habit,
Of running away..

Only when i met you,
Did i realise,
That its impossible to kick the habit.

'Cause you are so pretty,
even the stars will fall,
even the moon shall wane..
Even more so is your character.
So Pure,
So Vibrant,
So Beautiful.

How can i kick the habit?


Sunday, September 12, 2010

How do you say "I love you" in a thousand different languages?

Love is something so special.. Its so awesome it goes beyond all boundaries, It goes beyond all races, all religion and all languages.. For in all languages.. Its the same. "I LOVE YOU"

Nothings happening today.. Somehow i forgot how my friends look like in one week.. Even her.. I think i feel nothing for her ordy..

A story today..

Cody and Jane were good friends.. They had been friends since they first met 3 years ago.. 

Cody was in love with Jane all throughout the year, yet he never said a thing to her.. He could not keep all those emotions within him for long.. Like a volcano about to erupt. He confided in his best friend about Jane..

He never realised until it was too late, His 'best' friend told everybody in the school about His relationship with Jane.. Eventually, Jane became stressed by the rumors. 

When Cody sat beside Jane, She would move a seat away... When he walked beside her, She would walk even faster.. Eventually their relationship went downhill.. They no longer talked as much as before..

Until one day, when Jane asked Cody for a paper and he complied.. Their friend sitting beside them suddenly commented, "You see Jane, Cody is such a gentleman, don't you just wanna accept him?" With that Jane rebuked, "That IS RIDICULOUS! I DON'T EVEN LIKE HIM!" Cody was rejected, His eyes burned with hatred for that friend, but he knew he was to be blamed.. If only he had not said anything. If only he did not trust him. It was all too late..

Eventually Cody thought that he was too stupid and too lazy to be even a strong candidate for anyone. To prove everyone else wrong, He studied so hard for his exam, eventually he passed with flying colors, above all. Now he is in a prestigious school. His rejection was his revelation, to change him in character and mind.


Saturday, September 11, 2010

I think i have no feelins for you anymore..

IF i truly like you.. I'll be longing for you during the holidaes.. But i felt nothing.. Nothing.. No feelin.. No sadness.. Because i no longer like you.. I love you.. WEEEE!!!...AS a friend..

Woke up mid-afternooon.. Probably going AMK tmr and getting lost again... Its fun walking around and getting lost.. I guess.. I really like AMK..

School starts 2 daes later.. Havent do any of my homework yet.. T_T..

Here's another poem.. This time.. Inspired by a friend.. Qiu Le.. Your Emo messages gives me enlightenment!!.. =D

Darkest Night 

On the Darkest Night and the Loneliest road.
I saw you standing there before me..

You were the one who led me out of the Darkness.
You were the one who brought light into my life.

You were the One.
The One and only.

Yet.. That light is slowly dying out.. 
As.. I slowly forget who you are..
As i slowly forget the times we had.
As I slowly feel Lonely..

As i slowly..As i slowly.. As i slowly..
There are a thousand things i can say..
But there is one sentence i will alway pray.

On the Darkest Night and the Loneliest Roads,
You brought light into my faith.

Im slowly forgetting how to write a poem.. I forget alot of things.. T_T

Friday, September 10, 2010

Face the demons... Stare them down.. bite the bullet...

A quote from somebody.. His Dad and GrandDad both died in Papua New Guinea (I think) both from plane related accidents.. His Dad died on a Passenger plane..His GrandDad died during WW2 when he crashed his plane.. He was a reporter and had to report on a plane crash with no survivors in that place.. On a helicopter.. How many times have i repeated something related to flying? =D Anyway.. he was really scared cos he thinks that place is jinxed for his family.. But he did anyway and he faced his own demons.. Stared them down.. Bit the bullet.. And apparently he's still alive and kicking.. =)

Well.. I forgot to wish all Muslim friends.. Selamat Hari Raya Adilfiltri.. did i spell that right? Anyway.. also.. Maaf Zahir Batin!.. I also need to beg for forgiveness for drinking water in class... =D

Well.. The Quran burning pastor is having second thoughts with the numerous protests in the world.. Serve him right.. One should never deny another of their religious rights for One have sinned by Greed, Pride and Wrath.. Greed for total monopoly over Religion.. Pride for being proud to the point that others don't stand in their eyes.. Wrath for sworing revenge on the September 11 attacks.. Though people have done wrong.. Its wrong to blame others just because they are the same.. Its like my friend stole something and got away with it while i get scolded when i didn't steal anything.. This world is F***ed up man.. >_<

Today's another poem.. This time.. I think it would be about.. Perseverance...

Onward and Persevere!

Have you ever felt..
That the world is crashing down upon you?
Have you ever felt..
That the homework intentionally flew..
Just to make you angry?
Have you ever thought.. 
Of giving up.. 
Cos the going is too tough?

If you ever thought so..
Then you are strong..
For you thought..
You felt..

But did you ever give up? 
If you did..
You would be high up in the clouds of Heaven..
Or down below in the bowels of Hell...
For you would have thrown yourself off that bridge...

But you are still here.. 
In this sickening,
annoying world.. 
Reading this post..

As one man said before..
"Face your demons, Stare them down"
As our Head Councillor had said before.
"Onward and Persevere."

Though to you... Its plain Heresay..
You truly did.. If you ever did..
Nothing is Truly.. Ever.. Impossible..


Thursday, September 9, 2010


Today's the same as always.. No see.. No mee.. =D Should i be freaking out right now cos EOY is near?

Well.. Watched Wipeout yesterday night.. Laughed like crazy.. ROFL.. =D

Nothing more to say i guess.. Went swimming.. Ate something at Northpoint.. Came home..

POEM! Immaturity?


When i see you in school..
You're always running about..
When i see you in class...
You're always joking around...
When i see you at the canteen..
You're always the loudest..

You exaggerate..
You make childishness seem awesome..
You make people happy..
Though i know you really ain't.

Your immaturity.. 
Is always high..
Its so high it makes you annoyingly pretty..

Makes me annoyingly boring too.. 
Thats why i like you.. 
Im opposite of you.. =D
But truly..
I love your Cute and Kiddy ways.. =)


You immaturity is what makes you annoyingly pretty............. =)

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

EOY coming...

THE END OF THE YEAR IS COMING!! OMG OMG!! OMG!!.. Its not the end of the world yet though.. Sad.. =D Just now went AMK by myself.. Lost my way a few times.. Walked through the hawker center like 7-10 times..Walked for 3 hours straight.. Looking out for pretty girls.. =) JKJK.. Nobody is as pretty as... *AHEM*.. =DD..

My Bro bought Legos today, seems like it is his new hobby... Im still gonna stick to Tamiya..and looking at pretty girls.. ;) that was a joke.. HaHaHa. =)

Though the End of year is coming.. I ain't gonna stop blogging i think.. I wont stop those poems until The Grand Finale =====> God knows what this is.. This came from mah HEAD! (That means.. I NEED TO HAVE 150+ POEMS!! 0_0!!)

I got the inspiration of writing a poem every single day from a friend's blog.. Though He/She never write everyday..

He/she? I tot she should come first? Ladies first? I guess the She's not Ladylike yet.. =) =)..  That brings us to the next poem! LADY LIKE!


You have the qualities any one could wish for.
You have the looks anyone could die for.
You have the smarts anyone would want.

Yet you have one quality not everybody has.. 
And certainly never wished for.
Your unladylikeness
and your immaturity,

It is what makes you unique.
It is what makes you beautiful to my eyes.
It is what makes your laughter pretty.
Better than modesty and ladylikeness
Could ever give.

For, it makes you.

To end it off with Shakespearean language. =D

I'll run through fire and Ice for Thy Sweet Sake. ;D


Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Can you be my friend?

Can you? T_T Sad.. But life still has to go on.. The newspaper worksheet still havent do yet.. Cannot find any info from the Net. I think i lost one of my limbs when i was rejected years ago..Now.. I think i lost one more.. Look MA! NO HANDS!..

Well..... Love poems.. YAYAYAYAYAYYY!!.............

Hey Pretty.

I was struck blind by your everlasting Beauty.
I was made speechless by your smile..
I was made deaf by your Cute Laugh..

If i can..

I'll want to have your beauty..
Your smile,
Your Laugh.. To be Mine only..
Yet, I cannot be selfish..

It'll be enough,
IF i can just say,
"Hey Pretty" 
To you every single day.

So that i can see your Smile.

Monday, September 6, 2010

If only i knew what im doing.. If only i knew..

Well... Many people ask me.. Why am i holding on to that dying hope? I should just give up since there's plenty of other fishes in the sea..Well.. To me.. She is not just a fish.. She's a Mermaid.. She is unique.. She is too good for me.. I really should give er' up for someone more worthy i guess.. This brings us to the next poem.. YAY!!!! MERMAID!!!... I dunno wad to write about mermaids..=_=""


Many once told me to give up.
Some told me to hold on.
A few told me to go for it..

Many told me there's plenty of fishes out in the sea..
Some told me she's a bass..
A few told me She's a Dragon.

But me, myself.. told me.
She's a Mermaid.
A Unique Mermaid.

Too good for me,
Too Kind for me..
Im too selfish if i don't give up.
I'm too weak if i don't hold on,
Im too intrusive if i go for it..

If only i knew what to do..
IF only i knew.



Almost forgot to blog todae.. T_T
Many things happened todae... Originally wanted to go for a run with my brother.. ended up eating KFC.. Maybe going Northpoint tmr with fiz to to homework... Sad... no girls... I feel like i'm desperate...

A story.. To behold.. I seriously don't know wad to write..

Bus Stop.

As i sat on that seat, on that very day, on that very hour, at that very second.. I noticed your flowing hair.. Your flawless skin,that tinge of sadness in your very eyes.. On that rainy, gloomy morning.. You were waiting for the bus, the bus to school, our school.

You didn't know me then, but i knew you.. I knew alot about you. I noticed you on that day.. when you came aboard that bus.. Now.. every morning, i sit at bus stop just to see you. 

I knew your name, i knew who you were, but i can never figure out what made you so sad.. What made you so oblivious to the world.. that everyday.. Your world is one in music.. Devoid of any emotion except sadness. The earphones you wear.. So black.. so white.. So emotionless.. 

Every morning, I sat beside you on that very seat. You never noticed me at all.. But i don't mind.. As long as you were there every morning... As long as you were there..As long as You were there.. 

Though we are in different classes.. My heart stayed with you.. though it is an unspeakable love.. My heart burned, when i can't see you.. If only you knew.. IF only you knew. Why did God put me in this class.. Why?

On that fateful day, you weren't there.. When i asked my friends.. When i asked everyone in school.. They'll give me a bewildered look.. They'll say.. "Haven't you heard? Her Dad sent her off to some other countries to further her studies.." I was heart-broken when i heard that.. I couldn't believe it.. 

Since that fateful day,  I had been waiting for you, on that very seat, at that very hour, at that very second. It had been a year..

Finally.. You were back.. on that very seat. Right beside me..

I know this is very sudden.. But would you let me be the one to lift that sad tinge off your eyes? 


WEll.. I did this in the middle of the night at 2.07.. T_T

Saturday, September 4, 2010

I'm a friggin risk-taker..

I'm climbing in yo' windows snatching yo kittens up.. Im Spiderman! I can imagine myself in a spiderman suit crashing into windows and trying to run out the front door.. =D

Im Cheering for anyone who needs a cheer now..
Im a help hotline.. if you need help.. please call "blablabla"..
IF you seriously need a listening ear.. just talk to me in school..
I will only.. "Um.. Ar...Orh.." =D

But.. Nobody ever listens to me.. Nobody can ever hear that dying heart.. People can only see the monster... The big friggin giant.. T_T Can anybody hug me? I think they cant.. Im too big..

Lets have a love-poem todae.. Tmr's a story.. Todaes a history.. =D


I'll imagine that you'll give me a hug.
I'll long for you to give me hug.
I'll just sit there,
Waiting for someone to give me a hug..

But now,
I know..

If i love you,
I don't need a hug from you,
For i'll hug you.
Even if you don't,

I know now..
I'm supposed to be the one,
who'll support you,
when you need it,
though it hurts me inside..

Go for him.. 
Hug Him.. 
IF i tell you.. I've given hope on you.. would you believe me? Would you be my friend once more?

Friday, September 3, 2010


Im a Ghost in school...When i walk past people.. They never notice me..When i am beside them.. They notice me with a shriek.. When i am alone and walking towards someone.. They say i look like a murderer, full of hostility...

I think i'm giving up hope.. I think i can't take these anymore..I'm tired of reaching for the stars.. I just wanna get down to Earth and go for things on the ground.. on my level..

Well.. Since i wrote more than 15 poems already.. I'll continue writing more. Lovey-Dovey none the less..

Giving Up.

If i give in to the fact now..
I'll no longer have to deceive myself,
Deceive my friends,
Deceive her.
Deceive all.

I don't wanna say i like you,
Because i love you.
I don't wanna say i want you,
Because i need you.
I don't wanna say I'll live for you,
Because i'll die for you.

If i give up now,
I don't need to have anything to do with you..
But will it turn back the clock? 
Will everything be the same as before?
Will you be with me once more?
Tell me,

Should i give up? 

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Maybe i'll drop dead the next morning?

This what i am always thinking.. This is how pessimistic i can get and how suicidal i may be.. =D

Gonna go for a run ltr by myself... Abit scared nowadays.. I feel like someone's STALKIN ME! (EGO much?) =D Feel abit unsafe.. Im always paranoid... T_T

WEll.. I never end this post without a poem.. no matter how much they suck...
Lovey-Dovey poems again!

Romeo and Juliet,
Lysander and Hermia,
Oberon, Titania,
Demetrius, Helena.

If only an epic could describe their love,
A novel would do nothing more.

Me & You,
Not even a story came..
but a spark that will ignite the longest flames,
a spark that will bring forth a story,
A spark of a new beginning.. 

Would be the spark of life.
You don't need to accept me,
I just need to pretend i dont know you..

I have only the faintest idea what this means... BTW, all those poems came from the subconcious me.. =D (I know! I sound crazy!)

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Happy Delayed Teacher's Dae!

Yesterdae was fun in school.. Backstage... Ok.. HAHA.. Ho Ching beat me up abit behind the wall when i was annoying the hell out of him until he wanted to say F***.. =D Siti changed gifts with me cos she doesnt know who Mr Goh CJ is... MY NCC TEACHA! So.. Alls well that ends well.. I get to give the gift to Mr Goh..The councillor Gifter or Giver? OR GiftVer? Tmr is Thursdae.. Hope i wont be so tired that i don't wanna come school early play basketball..

Getting my interest in BBALL back.. After my BBall went missing.. I'm playing Bball in the hope that i'll find it in behind the fences..  I'm gonna play so hard that i'll own WK and atleast fare abit against Wilson.. Let's be a Super BBALL Double-TEAM FIZ! Triple team if WK is inside.. =D

Learned how to shoot from Wilson.. Getting better at aiming thanks to him.. Well.. You gotta know your enemy to win him....  I'm always under the hoop so that i can try alleying.. managed to do a fake one though.. its hard.. =D

Saw a few friends in my Old School.. My bestfriend forgot who i was.. =D

Well Todae's hopefully not a Love Poem! (I got something to write now..)


Everyday we dread seeing you..
Everday we fear seeing you...
Everyday we freeze when we see you..
Everyday we drop dead when we see you..

Everyday is like hell with you...

But.. Everyday you'll love seeing us...
Everyday you'll love us...
Everyday you'll help us..
Everyday.. No matter when... No matter what.. You'll try to be a friend.. 

Though we are so annoying..
Though we make you a year old every second..
Though we made your dreams a hell..
Though we always bite the hand that feeds us...

You're an angel without wings..
For you gave us yours..


P.S: My ambition when i was young was to be a teacher... So that i can guide the kids on the right path.. I wished to be a barrier to the wrong path.. no matter how many try to push through..